I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
