billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
