Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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