She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
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