Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
