may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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