and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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