Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
