are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I think people are normalizing furries
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
