are you still at the devil's house?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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