He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Randomize
