guys are only as good as the porn they watch
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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