quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
