Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
