tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
