Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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