White coat. Heels.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
This is my gift to your gina
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
