Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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