Pappa wants mamma naked
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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