just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
