why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
