so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
