ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Randomize
