Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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