Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
