I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
