North Korea, Best Korea!
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
NoShamevember. You game?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
