addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You can't just leave with hair like that
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
