I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Are we still banned from the library?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
