real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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