would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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