I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
