We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Randomize