well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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