i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
