Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
