anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
