once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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