She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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