yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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