I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
