are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
