but the lizard people decide everything anyway
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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