I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
