how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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