you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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