Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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