i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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