This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
