bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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